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The 2006 PlanetCrap Trollie Awards.
January 31st 2007, 17:04 CET by CheesyPoof Only lagging the Oscars by a week or so, this isn't too late. M0nty is too lazy to do it proper so I'll do it, again. I took out the 'foreign' nonsense and made up some new categories. Have fun. PLANETCRAP DIVISION PlanetCrap's Worst Attempt At A Troll -- Wudi. Another poor effort this year to win again. PlanetCrap's Least Comprehensible Troll -- bago. Could go to none1a, but I say give it to bago so he has something positive to say about 2006. PlanetCrap's Most Pretentious Troll -- Marsh Davies. You could also consider Bago, but who else could wax so eloquently about a video game called Gears of War like it was a lost work of Chaucer? PlanetCrap's Best Multiclass Troll [e.g. Dev/Troll, Journo/Troll] - gaggle. Does he have taste in anything? PlanetCrap's Best Drama Queen Troll -- UncleJeet, we hardly could stand ya. Now you melted down and gone away. PlanetCrap's Best User of Cliches To Deflect Trolls -- Jibble (again). PlanetCrap's Best Cliche-spawning Troll -- I can't think of any new cliches. The best I could think of is Warren's "you're awesome" for bago, but it's not really turned into a cliche yet. PlanetCrap's Most Predictable Troll -- Your Friend. Ds comes back, and he calls him a stupid mick. So tired. PlanetCrap's Most Prolific & Persistent Troll -- The_Joker for last years TOTY thread. PlanetCrap's Spolier Troll -- Greg in a landslide. PlanetCrap's Best Annoying Troll -- This is the troll that gets under your skin. Any of BobJustBob, Jibble, G-Man, Hugin, Chris, Gabe, Greg, yotsuya and more, could win this category. It's wide open! PlanetCrap's Most Witty Troll -- chris. Dum has been off. Especially so since he got WoW. PlanetCrap's Most Convincing Conversion From Troll To Human - No one, again. This category will have to go away. PlanetCrap's Best New Troll/Lurker to Troll -- assembler. The only new person of note this year. PlanetCrap's Best Single Troll Post -- I don't know of any. PlanetCrap's Best Comeback Troll -- chris. Caryn and Gabe have a meet up with him, and he comes back. Hooray! TROLL OF THE YEAR PlanetCrap's Best Overall Troll -- M0nty. M0nty is far to modest to award the TOTY to Warren, but M0nty successfully trolled Joker into not posting for a month, and that deserves the top award. |
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Topic: The 2006 PlanetCrap Trollie Awards.
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Boy, everything is so clear to you guys. Clearly, the creaking of the boards should have been a dead giveaway. "Testiculos habet et bene pendentes" — "He has testicles, and they dangle nicely."
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A flat board with lights in the shape of a cartoon character, that even to people who have never seen the show looks like a space invader, is NOT A BOMB. Yes, I've already said that your hindsight is 20/20. If you honestly believe that it's impossible that the device couldn't have been a detonator or something else equally bad, you're being naive. "Oh, but it's cute! It coudn't possibly be a bomb!" |
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no, i'm not. Have you seen home made bombs? They aren't exactly that sophisticated usually. They don't involve craftsmanship, which is why a lot of bombers end up setting the damn things off early. Perhaps it is you that watches too much 24. "Testiculos habet et bene pendentes" — "He has testicles, and they dangle nicely."
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Why does the bomb have to be home made? Both you and bago are jumping to conclusions that prove your point but you aren't basing those conclusions on anything other than hindsight and wishful thinking. |
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There's a lot of haggle gaggling in here today, some of which is gaggle himself. |
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http://a.abcnews.com/images/US/ap_adult_swim4_070131_nr.jpg I bet whoever spotted it saw exposed batteries+red wire+capacitors and diodes and whatnot, period. From up close, and unlit, I bet they didn't even register the space invader-y shape at all. |
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Hugin Nonsense! I don't see a 1x1 foot blob of C4 attached to the front so it doesn't look suspicious in the slightest. |
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"Man, I'm bored..why don't I screw up my day, and the day of all my buddies, and the day of all the commuters, and draw down the ire of my boss, and force everyone to stand around outside in frigid temperatures for hours." If everyone involved is going to mea culpa their way out of it by Warren Marshalling the press conference into "Well, if the box of puppies had been an al Qaeda organic fission implosion device, you'd all look pretty stupid right about now. Where's our federal grant?" - they might just get in on the action. every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street |
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Whatever. If it had actually been something, you wouldn't be posturing and acting like a bomb removal expert. |
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If you scroll up, you'll notice I've been doing neither. every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street |
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Wow. |
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What? every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street |
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I will concede that one could have confused it for an F-bomb. "Testiculos habet et bene pendentes" — "He has testicles, and they dangle nicely."
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A bomber wouldn't make a device that obvious. The boxes didn't irk the police in the rest of the nation, and no, Hugin, the big dig collapse is not a reason to be jumpy and overreact. If that was the case NY and DC should have called in the National Guard. |
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Late Update: Just before Futurama last night, Adult Swim apologized to the citizens of Boston, which means they feel they should share some of the blame for the incident. Part of the text of that bump is on their web site right now, and reads as follows: We apologize to the citizens of Boston that part of a marketing campaign was mistaken for a public danger. We appreciate the gravity of this situation and, like any responsible company would, are putting all necessary resources toward understanding the facts surrounding it as quickly as possible. As soon as we realized that an element of the campaign was being mistaken for something potentially dangerous, appropriate law enforcement officials were notified and through Federal law enforcement channels, we identified the specific locations of the advertisements in all 10 cities in which they are posted. We also directed the third-party marketing firm who posted the advertisements to take them down immediately. We appreciate the commitment demonstrated by the Boston Police Department and other law enforcement agencies, as well as the Massachusetts Governor's Office, and deeply regret the hardships experienced as a result of this incident. I'd say this is probably the best response to it. "Sorry about that" plus making sure that the authorities knew exactly where all of the pieces were. This helps close the door on anyone who might decide to build a bomb that looks like one of those things and post it somewhere, guessing that everyone would leave it alone. So...how long do you think it'll be before one of them goes up on eBay? Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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Yes, Boston, and continue to prosecute the two schlubs that put them there! Do it!!! Put 'em in the drunk tank with the winos, that'll teach 'em!!! |
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A bomber wouldn't make a device that obvious. Or WOULD they? |
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I should say, for the record, I think it's silly to arrest the people who put the things up. And personally, after the initial report (which came around 10:30), that the things, whatever they were, didn't appear to contain explosives, I assumed they were some MIT experiment, something GPS or Wifi related maybe. But no, I'm not going to blame authorites for checking out an unknown device attached to a piece of public infrastructure. They didn't have a sticker on the back that said "Cartoon network rules!", or a contact phone number (so far as I know anyway). They weren't on billboards. The people in charge of maintaining the bridges and such they were attached to apparently didn't know about them. And when reports started coming in that people were finding more of them on other bridges and highway structures? Bah. Maybe I'll stick some wacky surprise gifts to the undersides of peoples cars all over the city, I'm sure folks will love that. Look, I think basically the mayor and the governor yell at Cartoon Network, Cartoon Network apologizes, Cartoon Network cuts the city some negotiated check to cover cop overtime or whatever behind the scenes, and other companies don't do stupid viral marketing stuff in Boston for another year or so. Viral marketing sucks anyway. |
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Jibble There you go. |
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You just knew it was going to happen. Those things are high-value collectors items now. Hugin, I'm okay with most of what you said, but I don't think the solution is "Stop viral marketing" (though I agree that it sucks). The solution is "Give a heads up to the local authorities before you start sticking your ads up all over town, especially if they contain any form of electronics or might look like graffiti. It's a few phone calls, you lazy fuckers." Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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The Boston police forgot one thing: no one cares enough about Boston to blow it up. :P -chris (I kid, I kid!) |
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The Philly media is playing lots of seething outrage because the lite brites are all over Philly, too. Talking about arrests, etc. It's just stupid. Turner told them where the "ads" were. Clean them up, and just move on. |^^^^^^^^^^^^ |||__
| こんにちは | ||'|"\,__. |_..._...______===|=||_|__|...,] (@)'(@)"""*|(@)*(@)*****(@) |
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One thing to remember here is that most police forces have a stanard procedure for dealing with unknown devices. That procedure is designed for maximum safty of the techs not quickly identifiying the device. That normally means figureing out if it's safe to move, detonating, then figureing out what you just blew up. Sure at times it results in silly things happening but it also prevents tech from being injured by thing that where never intended to harm anyone. For example these things could have been degisned to explode in a flash at the end of the campaign (which would have fit one of the shows running gags), something that wouldn't hirt the bridge or people but could prove very bad for a tech standing inches away studying the resistors. As for chargeing the people for it, I'd say if an ordinary citizen would be charge for the prank with out the bomb angle (I''m think causing a public nuisance would be likely) the marketers should be as well. Tuner and the marketing company should also be faceing fines from any sign code and approval process violations that took place. The marketers need to get a message that calling it marketing isn't a pass for breaking the law while pulling these stunts. The bomb angle on the other hand should be taken care of behind closed doors. |
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For example these things could have been degisned to explode in a flash at the end of the campaign (which would have fit one of the shows running gags) That's stretching it a bit, as I don't think any marketing firm would be dumb enough to put exploding advertisements (even of a very small variety) out in public. If they were dumb enough to do that, then they'd get what they deserved. They're blowing this out of proportion with "WHAT IF!" scenarios that have no bearing to the case at hand. I'd imagine you'd have a hard time getting a death penalty sentence if the prosecution's case was "Well, he got in a fight with the guy, but what if he had pulled out a gun and fired six rounds into his chest?! What if?! We need to teach this man a lesson!" Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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A few things: Assistant Attorney General John Grossman called the light boards "bomblike" devices and said that if they had been explosive they could have damaged transportation infrastructure in the city. Again, why is someone being prosecuted on something that "could have" happened as the result of what wasn't actually done? Judge Paul K. Leary told Grossman that, according to law, the suspects must intend to create a panic to be charged with placing hoax devices. Ayup. No intent = charges don't stick. In a news conference, Rich told reporters he had advised his clients not to discuss the incident. Stevens and Berdovsky took the podium and said they were taking questions only about haircuts in the 1970s. See, this is what Tony Snow needs to do instead of saying "We have no comment on the pending investigation." When a reporter accused them of not taking the situation seriously, Stevens responded, "We're taking it very seriously." Asked another question about the case, Stevens reiterated they were answering questions only about hair and accused the reporter of not taking him and Berdovsky seriously. Reporters did not relent and as they continued, Berdovsky disregarded their queries, saying, "That's not a hair question. I'm sorry." Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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That's an awesome way to hold a press conference. |
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#103 by Jibble That's stretching it a bit, as I don't think any marketing firm would be dumb enough to put exploding advertisements (even of a very small variety) out in public. Maybe but the point is the techs don't know that going in or even that it's from a marketing firm. To deal with that possibility they have to treat it as an unknown device and follow the appropriate procedures, which in the case of as possible bomb means safely detonate it then figure out what the heck it was. To use your example if a cop where to walk in on the fight he's likely to be prepared to pull his gun on the off chance one of the men has a weapon. I'm not saying anyone should be charged on the basis of "omg possible bomb" that should be left to the fact they wheren't legaly placed to begin with. I'm still a bit iffy on if both the individuals and the companies should be charged. On one hand they are effectivly illegally placed signs which would usualy mean a fine and order to remove then, on the other hand individual penelties shouldn't extend beyond community service (so no major harm would be done) and marketers really need to get the idea that what amounts to graffiti isn't a valid marketing idea. |
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The funny thing about this is that the marketing firm will walk away from this having posted $3000 in bail. The lesson they learned: Make it look like a bomb and you'll get national media coverage for two days. Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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Enjoyable read on this whole thing. |
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That's a good take. - words and stuff -
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First, boy is it boring to read bloggers sniping at each other. Second: I can attest that here in the Land of the Cod, life proceeded on a more or less even and steady keel. Unless you tried to cross a certain bridge or pass by a certain landmark during a specific two-hour period yesterday In other words, he wasn't inconvenienced by it, so he doesn't think it was that big a deal. Way to play the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card while trying to scold someone...for using the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card. Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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It's a little smug and heavy-handed, but enjoyable nonetheless. -chris |
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Agreed. every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street |
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Well written, if nothing else. every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street |
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A little smug? I'd hate to see what a whole lotta smug looks like. |
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Jibble I think you're reading it wrong. He's not sniping. He's presenting the most level headed take I've seen on the situation yet. |
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It was damned inconvenient at rush hour, because the placement of the things inherently caused road shutdowns. Sullivan Square, where the first one was found, is a major public transit hub. But no, the city didn't shut down. |
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#110 by Jibble In other words, he wasn't inconvenienced by it, so he doesn't think it was that big a deal. Way to play the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card while trying to scold someone...for using the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card. Naw... I thought he was just responding to the hyperbole with which the situation was reported by the press - the way it was presented over here made it sound like that Boston was completely paralysed with terror, as opposed to being inconvenienced at a busy time of day. - words and stuff -
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That blogger is ass-ugly even hidden behind sunglasses and a hat. Therefore his opinion is worthless! YHBT. YHL. HAND
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None of this interests me. On the plus side, Sarah Silverman's show starts tonight. That interests me... a lot. |
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She's funny sometimes, but... Jesus is Magic was horrible. Painful to watch. Had to shut it off halfway through. YHBT. YHL. HAND
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What show is this? Even I know what crossing the Rubicon means, and I know fuck all about American history. -m0nty
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I'm going to London on Thursday for work. I'll be there a week. My hotel is right next to Victoria Station. Any suggestions on things to see and food that isn't awful would be much appreciated. World of Warcraft is a pie eating contest where the reward is more pie.
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You should bring some ATHF signs with you to London. They REALLY know how to overreact to terrorists threats there! and food that isn't awful would be much appreciated. McDonalds is pretty much your best bet for fine dining in the UK. YHBT. YHL. HAND
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It was damned inconvenient at rush hour, because the placement of the things inherently caused road shutdowns. Sullivan Square, where the first one was found, is a major public transit hub. One of the many amusing parts about this is that they were placed exactly where an advertisement should be placed if you're trying to go for the most eyeballs. High traffic, high impact spots around the city. Oh, and that guy is ridiculously smug. Of course, so are the rest of us. Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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Best response ever! The Japanese may make all the cars, the Chinese all the clothes and the French all the, um, Frenchmen. But damn if we don't lead the world in catchphrases.
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I was working from home yesterday so I didn't even hear about it. World of Warcraft is a pie eating contest where the reward is more pie.
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Oh god, that video is greatness. Somehow I'm not surprised that Fox kept them on the air that long. Gotta fill that time! TERROR ALERT! Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.
Blog. 198 lbs. 18 to go. |
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McB - Cool. I don't know the kind of things you are into, or what you may have seen before. In terms of sight-seeing, I'd recommend checking out the bright lights of Leicester Square and Picadilly Circus, then maybe stroll from there down past the National Gallery, through Trafalgar Square, down Whitehall and to the Houses of Parliament. It's not a long walk but it knocks out about 5 or 6 landmarks in one go and gives you a good sense of the buzz and feel of London. That's my favourite area of the city. In terms of Things To Actually Do, you could catch a play (the area above is full of theatres) or a film (Leicester Square is where they hold the premieres in London and has some huge, but absurdly priced, screens). I'm not sure what else is on at the moment, but I know that there's a performance of Porgy and Bess that's got good reviews (at the Savoy Theatre). I'm hoping to get along to see that for my birthday on Tuesday. You should check out the Tate Modern for sure. It's in a nice area overlooking the Thames, and the building itself is fairly awesome, even if the stuff inside isn't your thing. It's free, too. St. Paul's, and many of the other churches around London, are well worth looking at as phenomenally beautiful pieces of architecture. As for food, I think Ergo's the one to advise you there. ;) It depends how much you want to spend, really. I baulk at anything over $20 a head, but if you are feeling fruity and want to splash out something in the region of $60, then you might do well to check out Rules restaurant which is in Maiden Lane, WC2. It's right in the heart of the city and is apparently one of the oldest restaurants, if not the oldest restaurant, in London. Dates back to 1798 a quick Google informs me. Oh look, a review. Actually it might be a good idea to have a look at the rest of the Guardian newspaper's picks for eateries. I'm sure their food editor can afford better meals than I can. There are a bunch of small restaurants that I rely on for decent and considerably cheaper food, but they all have generic continental sounding names and I will have to check up on their actual addresses for you. Belgo is a fairly cheap Belgian-style restaurant where you can get muscles and the like. Food For Thought in Covent Garden is a dirt cheap veggie restaurant that's pretty quirky and cool. Now. Pubs. You could check out the Horse and Groom, which is in Belgravia, very near to Victoria. Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese (Fleet Street), and The Ship and Shovel (located in the amusingly named Craven passage, near Embankment) are two of my favourites. Fancy A Pint is a reliable source for finding good pubs in your postal code. Hope that helps, and that there isn't too much stuff to sift through here. I'm going down to London tomorrow, but I may have to come back to Cardiff about the time that you arrive. If it works out that I'm down there, I'd be happy to meet up and take you somewhere to eat/drink. - words and stuff -
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So apparently Microsoft has made Vista incompatible with iTunes; you can't authorize the computer to play tracks bought from the iTunes Store. Nice. Jean-Robert Bourdage ... Hot dog vendor
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