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T O P I C
The 2006 PlanetCrap Trollie Awards.
January 31st 2007, 17:04 CET by CheesyPoof

Only lagging the Oscars by a week or so, this isn't too late. M0nty is too lazy to do it proper so I'll do it, again. I took out the 'foreign' nonsense and made up some new categories. Have fun.

PLANETCRAP DIVISION
PlanetCrap's Worst Attempt At A Troll -- Wudi. Another poor effort this year to win again.
PlanetCrap's Least Comprehensible Troll  -- bago. Could go to none1a, but I say give it to bago so he has something positive to say about 2006.
PlanetCrap's Most Pretentious Troll  -- Marsh Davies. You could also consider Bago, but who else could wax so eloquently about a video game called Gears of War like it was a lost work of Chaucer?
PlanetCrap's Best Multiclass Troll [e.g. Dev/Troll, Journo/Troll]  - gaggle. Does he have taste in anything?
PlanetCrap's Best Drama Queen Troll  -- UncleJeet, we hardly could stand ya. Now you melted down and gone away.
PlanetCrap's Best User of Cliches To Deflect Trolls  -- Jibble (again).
PlanetCrap's Best Cliche-spawning Troll  -- I can't think of any new cliches. The best I could think of is Warren's "you're awesome" for bago, but it's not really turned into a cliche yet.
PlanetCrap's Most Predictable Troll  -- Your Friend. Ds comes back, and he calls him a stupid mick. So tired.
PlanetCrap's Most Prolific & Persistent Troll  -- The_Joker for last years TOTY thread.
PlanetCrap's Spolier Troll  -- Greg in a landslide.
PlanetCrap's Best Annoying Troll  -- This is the troll that gets under your skin. Any of BobJustBob, Jibble, G-Man, Hugin, Chris, Gabe, Greg, yotsuya and more, could win this category. It's wide open!
PlanetCrap's Most Witty Troll  -- chris. Dum has been off. Especially so since he got WoW.
PlanetCrap's Most Convincing Conversion From Troll To Human  - No one, again. This category will have to go away.
PlanetCrap's Best New Troll/Lurker to Troll  -- assembler. The only new person of note this year.
PlanetCrap's Best Single Troll Post  -- I don't know of any.
PlanetCrap's Best Comeback Troll  -- chris. Caryn and Gabe have a meet up with him, and he comes back. Hooray!

TROLL OF THE YEAR
PlanetCrap's Best Overall Troll -- M0nty. M0nty is far to modest to award the TOTY to Warren, but M0nty successfully trolled Joker into not posting for a month, and that deserves the top award.
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Home » Topic: The 2006 PlanetCrap Trollie Awards.

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#111 by chris
2007-02-01 21:46:20
cwb@shaithis.com http://www.cerebraldebris.com
It's a little smug and heavy-handed, but enjoyable nonetheless.

-chris

#112 by mgns
2007-02-01 21:46:44
Agreed.

every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street
#113 by mgns
2007-02-01 21:46:53
Well written, if nothing else.

every victory has a taste that's bittersweet
and it's your face I'm looking for on every street
#114 by CheesyPoof
2007-02-01 21:49:41
A little smug? I'd hate to see what a whole lotta smug looks like.
#115 by Warren Marshall
2007-02-01 21:49:42
http://www.wantonhubris.com/
Jibble

I think you're reading it wrong.  He's not sniping.  He's presenting the most level headed take I've seen on the situation yet.
#116 by Hugin
2007-02-01 21:52:20
lmccain@nber.org
It was damned inconvenient at rush hour, because the placement of the things inherently caused road shutdowns.  Sullivan Square, where the first one was found, is a major public transit hub.

But no, the city didn't shut down.
#117 by Marsh Davies
2007-02-01 21:57:56
www.verbalchilli.com
#110 by Jibble

In other words, he wasn't inconvenienced by it, so he doesn't think it was that big a deal. Way to play the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card while trying to scold someone...for using the "What are you people whining about, it's not that big a deal!" card.

Naw... I thought he was just responding to the hyperbole with which the situation was reported by the press - the way it was presented over here made it sound like that Boston was completely paralysed with terror, as opposed to being inconvenienced at a busy time of day.

#118 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-01 22:01:34
That blogger is ass-ugly even hidden behind sunglasses and a hat.  Therefore his opinion is worthless!

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#119 by Matt Perkins
2007-02-01 22:07:49
wizardque@yahoo.com http://whatwouldmattdo.com/
None of this interests me. On the plus side, Sarah Silverman's show starts tonight. That interests me... a lot.

#120 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-01 22:09:29
She's funny sometimes, but... Jesus is Magic was horrible.  Painful to watch.  Had to shut it off halfway through.

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#121 by Shadarr
2007-02-01 22:09:39
shadarr@yahoo.com http://digital-luddite.com
What show is this?

Even I know what crossing the Rubicon means, and I know fuck all about American history. -m0nty
#122 by McBain
2007-02-01 22:17:35
I'm going to London on Thursday for work.  I'll be there a week.  My hotel is right next to Victoria Station.  Any suggestions on things to see and food that isn't awful would be much appreciated.

World of Warcraft is a pie eating contest where the reward is more pie.
#123 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-01 22:25:40
You should bring some ATHF signs with you to London.  They REALLY know how to overreact to terrorists threats there!


and food that isn't awful would be much appreciated.


McDonalds is pretty much your best bet for fine dining in the UK.

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#124 by Jibble
2007-02-01 22:29:28
It was damned inconvenient at rush hour, because the placement of the things inherently caused road shutdowns.  Sullivan Square, where the first one was found, is a major public transit hub.

One of the many amusing parts about this is that they were placed exactly where an advertisement should be placed if you're trying to go for the most eyeballs. High traffic, high impact spots around the city.

Oh, and that guy is ridiculously smug. Of course, so are the rest of us.

Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.

Blog. 198 lbs.  18 to go.
#125 by bago
2007-02-01 22:30:02
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
Best response ever!

The Japanese may make all the cars, the Chinese all the clothes and the French all the, um, Frenchmen. But damn if we don't lead the world in catchphrases.
#126 by McBain
2007-02-01 22:31:29
I was working from home yesterday so I didn't even hear about it.

World of Warcraft is a pie eating contest where the reward is more pie.
#127 by Jibble
2007-02-01 22:40:19
Oh god, that video is greatness. Somehow I'm not surprised that Fox kept them on the air that long. Gotta fill that time! TERROR ALERT!

Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.

Blog. 198 lbs.  18 to go.
#128 by Marsh Davies
2007-02-01 23:14:20
www.verbalchilli.com
McB -

Cool. I don't know the kind of things you are into, or what you may have seen before. In terms of sight-seeing, I'd recommend checking out the bright lights of Leicester Square and Picadilly Circus, then maybe stroll from there down past the National Gallery, through Trafalgar Square, down Whitehall and to the Houses of Parliament. It's not a long walk but it knocks out about 5 or 6 landmarks in one go and gives you a good sense of the buzz and feel of London. That's my favourite area of the city.

In terms of Things To Actually Do, you could catch a play (the area above is full of theatres) or a film (Leicester Square is where they hold the premieres in London and has some huge, but absurdly priced, screens). I'm not sure what else is on at the moment, but I know that there's a performance of Porgy and Bess that's got good reviews (at the Savoy Theatre). I'm hoping to get along to see that for my birthday on Tuesday.

You should check out the Tate Modern for sure. It's in a nice area overlooking the Thames, and the building itself is fairly awesome, even if the stuff inside isn't your thing. It's free, too.

St. Paul's, and many of the other churches around London, are well worth looking at as phenomenally beautiful pieces of architecture.

As for food, I think Ergo's the one to advise you there. ;)

It depends how much you want to spend, really. I baulk at anything over $20 a head, but if you are feeling fruity and want to splash out something in the region of $60, then you might do well to check out Rules restaurant which is in Maiden Lane, WC2. It's right in the heart of the city and is apparently one of the oldest restaurants, if not the oldest restaurant, in London. Dates back to 1798 a quick Google informs me. Oh look, a review. Actually it might be a good idea to have a look at the rest of the Guardian newspaper's picks for eateries. I'm sure their food editor can afford better meals than I can.

There are a bunch of small restaurants that I rely on for decent and considerably cheaper food, but they all have generic continental sounding names and I will have to check up on their actual addresses for you. Belgo is a fairly cheap Belgian-style restaurant where you can get muscles and the like. Food For Thought in Covent Garden is a dirt cheap veggie restaurant that's pretty quirky and cool.

Now. Pubs. You could check out the Horse and Groom, which is in Belgravia, very near to Victoria. Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese (Fleet Street), and The Ship and Shovel (located in the amusingly named Craven passage, near Embankment) are two of my favourites. Fancy A Pint is a reliable source for finding good pubs in your postal code.

Hope that helps, and that there isn't too much stuff to sift through here. I'm going down to London tomorrow, but I may have to come back to Cardiff about the time that you arrive. If it works out that I'm down there, I'd be happy to meet up and take you somewhere to eat/drink.

#129 by Leslie Nassar
2007-02-01 23:16:44
http://departmentofinternets.com
So apparently Microsoft has made Vista incompatible with iTunes; you can't authorize the computer to play tracks bought from the iTunes Store.  Nice.

Jean-Robert Bourdage ... Hot dog vendor
#130 by jjohnsen
2007-02-01 23:28:29
http://www.johnsenclan.com
#120 by Mister Nutty

She's funny sometimes, but... Jesus is Magic was horrible.  Painful to watch.  Had to shut it off halfway through.

What the hell are you talking about?

Actually, the liberalism of the media - as a general thing - IS a major fallacy. What the media is, is a whore.  -LP       Johnsen Family
#131 by Chunkstyle
2007-02-01 23:40:56
Sarah Silverman's movie.  I liked it.

Game Developers: Don't forget the zombie monkeys.
#132 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-01 23:40:57

What the hell are you talking about?


Sarah Silverman.

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#133 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-01 23:41:16
Don't listen to Chunkstyle, it was dreadful.

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#134 by lwf
2007-02-01 23:44:48
The standup was pretty funny for the most part. I like her. Hate Jimmy Kimmel.

Today Officer Koon, Officer Nigger-hater, and Officer Keep-darky-down were acquitted of all racist charges. Wii.
#135 by Matt Perkins
2007-02-01 23:55:11
wizardque@yahoo.com http://whatwouldmattdo.com/
Now one likes Kimmel though.

Silverman is both extremely funny and very hot. That's a winning combination in my mind.

#136 by Ds_
2007-02-02 00:21:15
roger.boal@gmail.com
No, the Boston pd didnt over-react, a suspect device was reported and dealt with appropriately.

In Ulster, 5-10 years ago, it would have been handled exactly the same way. Its not pussification, its not over-reaction, its dealing with something that has the potential to be nasty.  3-4 oz of semtex on the back of that board, wait til someone takes it down to 'trace the wires' and blow it in their face, instant dead bombsquad member. Or someone takes it home for their kids, sayonara fingers or kids.

Suspect devices are not examined carefully, all up close and personal. You send a drone in with either a high pressure water cannon or a modified shotgun, and do your damndest to render the device harmless.  Meanwhile you have the area cordoned off to a reasonable distance.

The IRA put bombs in trash cans, phonebooths, carbombs, they put handgrenades in pintglasses and stuck them on open doors, they boobytrapped gates, put mortar launchers into the back of vans.  Simply put, you dont take the fucking chance its harmless, because the one time you think 'eh its just a litebrite' some fucker is going to have it wired to a few lbs of commercial plastique and take some poor bastards head off. Its not holywood machismo at work, its not omg terrar Im gonna be a hero, its reacting to a potential threat in an appropriate fashion.  Do you really think the rest of the fucking world hasnt had to deal with this shit for a while?  Ask the germans about their various issues, or the french, or the fucking spaniards, then take a look at the bombs that have been set off in those countries.  Take a moment to contrast how the rest of the world gets the fuck on with things compared to the US, then realise that its not about fighting terrorism, its politcal grandstanding by a worthless fuck who couldnt pour piss out of a boot with the instructions on the heel.

America is being spoonfed bullshit about 'omg terrar' thats not even remotely akin to what its like, fucking hell people, the airport security that is utterly worthless, do you see Israeli airlines doing the same? how about any of those flying out of the middle east. No you fucking dont, and given the hijackings and take overs of the late 70s to mid 80s, you have to wonder, what the fuck are they doing different.  Too much of America's response to the threat can be summed up as 'dont pay attention to the man behind the curtain', its phony, for show and utterly fucking worthless.

That said, Id rather be stuck in traffic and delayed because of a false alarm, than have to deal with friends and relatives not coming home ever again. Car Bombs are the worst sort, was caught in the blast radius of one in the mid 80s, its abrupt, its out of nowhere and its fucking terrifying.  Fortunately the worst I got from it was a pounding headache and some glass cuts to my arms

(ps, Im a little cranky right now, excuse the diatribe)
#137 by bago
2007-02-02 00:42:27
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
See with a car bomb you can contain the potential mass required for an effective explosion. Those signs could parely pop if they were made of 1 d battery and 3 d batteries worth of C4. Barely the size of a claymore, and is not going to cause structural damage to steel, especially when the wave has to attenuate over several feet. Anti-personnel at best, shooting lite brite pegs instead of nails or steel fragments.

The reason I harp on the structural potential is that part of the decision to elevate the terror threat level was the emplacement of the devices on on key structural points, like bridges. Shaped charges work because they focus the blast wave by shaping the charge to focus the shockwave. Having even a few inches of highly compressible air in the path of the shockwave will highly attenuate the wave, rendering the charge more and more useless at an exponential rate.

If this was a terror attack, anyone even marginally competent should have realize the potential threat was about as large as the threat to take down the brooklyn bridge with butane torches.

By overreacting in this manner you are only exposing a MAJOR weakness in your security system, namely that provoking overreactions you effectively paralyze the overall system with a much greater efficiency than you do by actually attacking it.

A terrorist now only needs 10 dollars of wires, batteries and duct tape to shut down a city for a day, rather than actually need ing to know how to make explosives, or anything like that. This does not make anyone safer, except for the doltish goons who use this as a pretext to justify their expensive security services.

The Japanese may make all the cars, the Chinese all the clothes and the French all the, um, Frenchmen. But damn if we don't lead the world in catchphrases.
#138 by Warren Marshall
2007-02-02 00:45:07
http://www.wantonhubris.com/
Did you read the link I posted bago?  Nobody over reacted.
#139 by Leslie Nassar
2007-02-02 00:48:00
http://departmentofinternets.com
uncovered; a vast network of bomb-making labs.

Jean-Robert Bourdage ... Hot dog vendor
#140 by Warren Marshall
2007-02-02 00:49:10
http://www.wantonhubris.com/
You know what I love?  How the (supposedly) knowledgeable, free thinkers out there who mock Boston's response have latched onto the "light brite" meme like goood little lemmings.

I mean, FFS, bago.  Right before your post there's a guy who has lived through what could have happened in Boston, and spent a good portion of his life in a country constantly under terrorist attacks, and you ramble on like he's not even there.  Listen for once.
#141 by Leslie Nassar
2007-02-02 00:53:29
http://departmentofinternets.com
i don't think the PD overreacted, but everyone else sure has.

Jean-Robert Bourdage ... Hot dog vendor
#142 by Ergo
2007-02-02 00:57:49
bago? Listen?


Hahahahahaha.

Drow are elves but evil. And you know they are evil because of their black skin, and because they are run by women. --Foodbunny

DVDs
#143 by Shadarr
2007-02-02 01:04:21
shadarr@yahoo.com http://digital-luddite.com
bago? Listen?


Hahahahahaha.

QFT

Even I know what crossing the Rubicon means, and I know fuck all about American history. -m0nty
#144 by bago
2007-02-02 01:05:09
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
Standard bomb disposal methods involving minimizing risk to the agents involved? Yes. What I provided was a specific refutation to stupid policy.

I admitted that car bombs should follow such policies, because they are massive enough to convert energy to structurally threatening levels. My argument is that a 5lb bomb should not be treated the same way as a 200 lb bomb.

It's a classic zero tolerance argument. If you are in the bomb disposal business and can't make that call, you are in the wrong business.

Should a cop block all traffic for 10 blocks and put out an APB for jaywalking? No. For a guy armed with an AR-15 that just shot 5 people? Yes.

If you can't make that distinction you shouldn't be a cop.

The Japanese may make all the cars, the Chinese all the clothes and the French all the, um, Frenchmen. But damn if we don't lead the world in catchphrases.
#145 by bago
2007-02-02 01:10:19
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
Or, to cite the article Warren linked:

their general attitude is that every time they mobilize and respond to something that turns out to be nothing, it makes them just a little bit better-prepared to deal with something that turns out to be something.


To treat all somethings as the same thing is stupid. There was time for analysis. The analysis was flawed. I showed why it was flawed.

Do want to argue with the analysis, or do you want to argue that there should be no analysis as soon as somebody says bomb?

The Japanese may make all the cars, the Chinese all the clothes and the French all the, um, Frenchmen. But damn if we don't lead the world in catchphrases.
#146 by LPMiller
2007-02-02 01:10:28
lpmiller@gotapex.com http://www.gotapex.com
It's awesome to hear from the law enforcement division of Microsoft.

"Testiculos habet et bene pendentes" — "He has testicles, and they dangle nicely."
#147 by Dumdeedum
2007-02-02 01:13:01
http://www.dumdeedum.com
I think the police should blow up more advertising.

#148 by LPMiller
2007-02-02 01:14:18
lpmiller@gotapex.com http://www.gotapex.com
I'd be happy if they just blew up advertisers.

"Testiculos habet et bene pendentes" — "He has testicles, and they dangle nicely."
#149 by m0nty
2007-02-02 01:16:04
http://tinfinger.blogspot.com
I agree with bago.
#150 by CheesyPoof
2007-02-02 01:17:55
You going for repeat TOTY?
#151 by m0nty
2007-02-02 01:20:12
http://tinfinger.blogspot.com
I'm just trying to live up to the fine example set by my hero and Officially Official 2006 PlanetCrap Troll Of The Year, Warren Marshall.
#152 by Jibble
2007-02-02 01:30:05
i don't think the PD overreacted, but everyone else sure has.

I agree with what Leslie wrote.

Lady, people aren't chocolates. But you know what they are, mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.

Blog. 198 lbs.  18 to go.
#153 by jjohnsen
2007-02-02 01:31:21
http://www.johnsenclan.com
#132 by Mister Nutty



What the hell are you talking about?

Sarah Silverman.

I know who you're talking about, I'm trying to figure out why you wouldn't think her movie was funny.

Actually, the liberalism of the media - as a general thing - IS a major fallacy. What the media is, is a whore.  -LP       Johnsen Family
#154 by Ergo
2007-02-02 01:41:33
Think about who said it.

Drow are elves but evil. And you know they are evil because of their black skin, and because they are run by women. --Foodbunny

DVDs
#155 by Warren Marshall
2007-02-02 01:42:17
http://www.wantonhubris.com/
It's awesome to hear from the law enforcement division of Microsoft.

Exactly.
#156 by yotsuya
2007-02-02 01:44:17
I'm surprised he's not saying the cops planted those there themselves.

I watched Aliens, and I didn't even get a lousy t-shirt.
#157 by Greg
2007-02-02 02:40:26
Not just the law enforcement division of Microsoft, but the rent-a-cop bomb squad division.

|^^^^^^^^^^^^ |||__
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(@)'(@)"""*|(@)*(@)*****(@)
#158 by None-1a
2007-02-02 02:55:27
#129 by Leslie Nassar
So apparently Microsoft has made Vista incompatible with iTunes; you can't authorize the computer to play tracks bought from the iTunes Store.  Nice.


Because you know apple hasn't had a year of feature complete Vista beta to correct compatibility problems. Of course the same thing applies to most companies really.
#159 by Mister Nutty
2007-02-02 03:04:22
I find Sarah Silverman to be funny in general, but everything in her movie, including the standup bits, was just fucking horrible.  Not a single laugh through the whole thing.


 Right before your post there's a guy who has lived through what could have happened in Boston, and spent a good portion of his life in a country constantly under terrorist attacks, and you ramble on like he's not even there.


Goddamn, I'm so sick of people Whatifing and saying "what could have happened".  Who gives a fuck what they would have done back in Northern Ireland during the IRA years?  9/11 was an isolated event, WE do not live in a country constantly under terrorist attack. Stop acting like we do you fucking PUSSY ASS PUSSIES.    The Boston police vastly overreacted.  The media overreacted even more.  Now everyone looks so foolish that SOMEONE HAS TO PAY.  But the whole event was a clusterfuck to begin with.    Bunch of fucking pansy-ass-panises jumping at your own shadows.

YHBT. YHL. HAND
#160 by lwf
2007-02-02 03:23:36
I still think Warren might be a bomb.

Today Officer Koon, Officer Nigger-hater, and Officer Keep-darky-down were acquitted of all racist charges. Wii.
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